Here are some ideas to keep kids busy, happy

By Marilyn Suttle

Ah, those long summer days... stretching out on a lounge chair at the beach, sipping a cool drink, lazily soaking up the sun, as you read a book, nap, and chat with other sun worshipers. Oh sorry, that's the article I'm writing for adults who don't have children.

All kidding aside, summer is a time to unwind and change gears. The daily structure and routine of school is over. The sun is shining. No more worries about being on time for school, getting the homework done, studying for tests, and keeping track of deadlines. Now our focus shifts to answering the big question, "What do I do with the kids?"

The "experts" tell us that summer is a time for kids to grow and be exposed to new experiences. They say that summer is a time to reinforce the three R's (reading, writing, and arithmetic). They say to plan the summer so that your children are revitalized and ready to start the next school year. But, just how are we supposed to do these things? They don't say!

Ideas are what we need. Well, here are some ideas to help make your summer with the children both nurturing and enjoyable.

A helpful way to start planning out a summer routine is to consider your children's interests. Kids will be much more receptive to learning new skills if you include them in the decision making. Look at class flyers with your children. When children have a voice in the decision making process it gives them a vested interest in following through.

Ask your kids, "What would be fun to do that you don't know how to do now?" There are a multitude of activities available in the summer from a wide variety of sources, including your public schools and community colleges. Just a few of the many options open to you are: swim lessons, nature walks, crafts, camps, skating, astronomy, tennis, golf, baseball, along with other sports and interests. Keep in mind that the focus should be on fun! We'll keep the fact that they're learning something a secret between you and me.

Weekends are a great time to have regular family outings. Consider planning picnics at the park or metro beaches. Plan outings to places like the Detroit Institute of Art, the Henry Ford Museum, Greenfield Village, the Ann Arbor Hands-On Museum, the Detroit Zoo, Cranbrook and the Marquee Theater.

If your children love crafts, consider a trip to The Scrap Box in Ann Arbor. Compare notes with other parents to discover and share a wide variety of enjoyable outings. Exposing your children to new experiences can have a big impact on their personal growth.

Be sure to check out the Summer 2000 Fun series each Wednesday at 10:30 a.m. in downtown Farmington. A series of free children's events from puppet shows to yo-yo's will be sponsored by Farmington Downtown Development Authority. Get more details by calling (248) 473-7283.

Taking regular trips to the library enhances your family's summer experiences. The library offers CD's, books on tapes, magazines, and computer games in addition to books. If your children have a great day at Domino's Farm, add resources from the library that reference their latest experience. Find a book about horses, shearing sheep, growing crops, or whatever piques their interest.

Remember, even a small new experience can be exciting and esteem building to a child. Children strive to be capable. One of the first sentences children say is "I do it". Being capable gives a child a sense of personal power. This is an essential part of being a successful person. If you are on vacation, let your child use the key card to unlock your hotel room door. Let the child fill the ice bucket, and give the tip. Give your children an area in the garden to grow vegetables. They can be responsible for watering and weeding their own area.

When my son Alex was seven years old, I pulled up to the bakery and asked him to go in and buy a banana cream pie to take over to grandmas house. At first he froze and asked, "Can kids just go in and buy a pie?" With a little encouragement, in he went as I watched. He waited in line, ordered the pie, paid for it, and out he came with the pie and a big smile on his face. It turned out that a fully costumed clown was in line behind him and was also buying a banana cream pie! What a great experience. To this day, he talks about how proud he was of himself.

You may have a child who is uncomfortable or shy to try new things. Small positive accomplishments like these go a long way in building courage. Hand your child the money to pay for an ice cream or pay the pizza delivery guy. Indirectly this will help them in the next school year. Keep in mind that it takes courage to raise your hand in class when you don't understand something. It takes courage to volunteer to take a part in the school play. If summer is filled with positive courage building activities, think of the impact it will have on the following school year. We want our children to get used to saying, "I can do it."

Helping your child retain what they learned during the school year can be relatively painless if you keep a positive and friendly attitude about it. Many schools suggest that reading just 15 minutes a day throughout the summer is a vital way to keep up reading skills. If your child is resistant to reading books, try providing interesting magazines, comics, even some computer games will provide a lot of reading as part of the game.

The Internet provides an outstanding source of learning. Stimulate your children's interests by looking at fun Web sites together. Use the search engines to discover more about activities they are involved in. Encourage them to send e-mail to grandparents and friends. Supervised time on the Net will enrich your children's summer experiences.

Having your children follow a simple recipe provides reading, and math skills, not to mention a sense of accomplishment. Hand your child a map before a car ride to find the best route. If your children are going to watch television, have them chart out what they plan on watching from the TV guide. This gives them the opportunity to follow rows and columns, another useful skill.

It is easy to loose yourself in the multitude of summer activities. Be sure to include simple unstructured time for playing in the your own backyard on the swing set, in the sand box, or jumping rope with friends. These moments can become some of your children's fondest childhood memories.

Marilyn Suttle provides personal and professional life-skills presentations, including parenting, work/life balance, and self esteem. Email her at MsSuttle@aol.com or visit her web site: www.SuttleOnline.net